The Blog ^ @subhashi.tania

God the veins on your hands look like soft branching rivers I notice it without meaning to In the same way the brain notices danger before language arrives Automatic.  And I wonder if psychology has a name for this this quiet distortion of focus when beauty becomes data and data becomes feeling. Then your voice happens. You say my name. And something in my nervous system misbehaves. A glitch of chemistry dopamine maybe or something softer science hasn’t named properly yet Chills run through me like my body is trying to confirm that I am still inside myself Still here. It is almost funny In class I learn about attachment theory about reward pathways about how the brain builds meaning from repetition and attention But none of it explains why one person can feel like a signal that interrupts every system I built to stay balanced. So I sit there, diagnosed by my own attention That somehow you became both the subject and the experiment in the same breath I use to think about you. - Subh...

that Saturday we became eternal Yes, I am that girl who loves the insane, dramatic kind of love the kind where feminine and masculine energies collide just by locking eyes. The clingy, “cringe-but-not-really” intimacy is my favourite where you can catch their scent simply by being near the things they used, especially their clothes… and you delay washing the places they touched because their presence still lives there. I love that look that moment when your eyes meet and you both laugh without saying a word, as if the joke travelled telepathically between two souls. And oh to make soup together on a random Saturday afternoon, your hands wrapped around me, sipping warmth and love at the same time that is the kind of intimacy I live for. -Subhashi Tania de Silva

I meet my own longing again You are a mirror shows me how much I ache to be understood how much of me is still unfolding In the next life I will not hesitate I will find you and sit beside you without walls or wounds between us If you ask me What changed in five years I’ll tell you Once, pain came like thunder and I stood in the storm, frozen for a whole day Now, pain still comes but I open the window let it rain let it weep with me and then I breathe it out like incense from a temple This is how I’ve changed I still feel everything But now I let it pass through me instead of becoming me - Subhashi Tania de Silva

I am scared to overlove you in a way that might harm you So I choose silence I choose to observe you from a distance I choose to let be My ego begs me to check in to reach out but what truly matters is that you are surrounded by the ones your soul attracts those who make your eyes light up without trying And still I ask the universe why did it make you blind to my open heart overflowing with a love so deep Why does it let me drown in the very sea I built to keep you warm?  - Subhashi Tania de Silva 

Tuesdays with Morrie is a conversation about life, love, and what really matters. It feels less like reading and more like sitting down with an old friend who has seen the world and wants to pass down everything he’s learned before it’s too late. Morrie Schwartz, a retired professor facing ALS, doesn’t dwell on self-pity. Instead, he shares wisdom that makes you stop and rethink how you're living your own life.   One of the things that struck me most was his perspective on emotions. He says, "I give myself a good cry if I need it, but then I concentrate on all good things still in my life." That’s such a simple but powerful approach to dealing with pain. Instead of avoiding sadness or pretending things don’t hurt, Morrie embraces it fully -then moves forward. It’s a lesson in resilience that feels so different from the usual “stay positive” mindset.   Morrie’s advice on love and marriage is brutally honest. He lays it out clearly - "If you don’t respect the other per...

I wonder... Can a woman in her 30s, unmarried and relentless, carve a space for herself in the world of architecture without losing pieces of who she is? You design skylines, draft blueprints of possibility, but where do you belong in the grand structure of life? You search for a soulmate in fleeting glances, in the way someone remembers your coffee order, in the silence that lingers just long enough to feel like home. But when they see the depth of your moods, the weight of your family’s history - do they stay? Can anyone truly hold space for the raw, unfiltered presence of your father, the past that shaped you? Maybe not. Maybe some will walk away. But love is not dead. Love is the quiet arrival in the middle of the storm. It’s the arms that hold you without needing explanations, the presence that doesn’t retreat when faced with your most unguarded reality. Love is not a promise of forever...it is the courage to stand still in the moment, without fear, without conditions. Piku...